Monday, November 07, 2005

2, 4, 6, 8, when can we consummate? Go Panthers


Carolina Panther cheerleaders Angela Keathley and Renee Thomas were arrested early Sunday morning at a Tampa Bay area bar after a bathroom fight. According to the police report, witnesses say the two Top Cat cheerleaders were having sex in a stall at Banana Joe's, when other female bar patrons waiting to use the bathroom started shouting at them. After leaving the stall Thomas allegedly punched one of the other female customers in the face, and when arrested used a false identity. Keathley was said to be so drunk she was barely able to stand.

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I'm not sure, but I think this is hilarious. Not because two women made out in a Tampa bar. That happens all the time. Nothing shocking there.

I think it's hilarious because two women were having sex with each other at a place called Banana Joe's. Banana Joe's sounds like the name of a bad tiki bar in Omaha. Big loud-mouthed deejays talking about "1/2 priced margaritas for all the ladies ALL NIGHT LONG at Banana Joe's!"

A quick Google scan of Banana Joe's in Tampa pulled up a link to Tampa Mojo and tales of hotties in the back room of Banana Joe's. The pictures on this website show lots of women hugging and dancing with each other, which quickly makes me figure that:

1) there aren't any men in Tampa
2) there are lots of hot lesbians in Tampa
3) lots of cute girls in Tampa try to lure sucker men into their clutches with provocative dancing and suggestive hugging of other women. Guys think "Hot potential lesbian 3 ways and stuff! Buy them shots, quick!"

I'm going with #3.

As Bill Maher says "that's just chum in the water," and damn he's right. Why are guys so damned predictable about hot girl-girl action? It ain't gonna happen with average girls, like a bank teller from Topeka and a payroll administrator from Ames. In the bar, sure they'll playfully tug each others' hair and grab their butts, but at the end of the night, they like the cock.

For hot girl-girl action in public, you gotta find two hot NFL cheerleaders.

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